THE LAFEYS

Jewel, Lillie & Mike


This here be the recollections of how the LaFey sisters, Durty Lillie and Jewel the Seer along with their handsome cousin, Michel Francois also known as Ratty Mike of Walshire, came to arrive at Port Royal Jamaica in the year of some Lord, 1653.
As told by Durty Lillie LaFey


Left:
Jewel (AKA Claudette Guy)
Durty Lillie (AKA Lillian Barnett)
Ratty Mike (AKA Michael Francis)
Lillie was born near Cardiff by the Sea, Wales and traveled with her sweet Mum, Siobhan, to County Cork where she grew up. She was defiant from the start it seemed. Her Da was purported to be a Royal French Sea captain named LaFey. He came and went as he pleased. He didn't look like no Royal to Lillie. He was short, dark and had a wicked temper..speaking French curse words profusely. He loved to drink and bellow commands no one paid much mind to, unless ye was on board his ship, The Repugnante. It were a fine frigate, just donít look too close at all the black powder marks on her sails.

When Lillie was 12, her dear Irish Mum had enough of her and were lookin' fer a way to unload the little darling. Captain Stinky Fingers LaFey shows up to woo his Siobhan again, and gets a 12 year old stow-a-way in return! His crew takes off south to the Gold and Ivory Coast, to beautiful Cote-d'Ivoire, that's French mates! Durty Lillie learns the ways of the sea. She learns what it means to be part of a crew and what Pyracy is!

Arriving near Cape Coast Castle, in Ghana, the crew are all lookin' serious like. Captain LaFey has made a secret arrangement to sell his daughter Lillie off in marriage to a old decrepit Lord there. It is the times of slaves and human bondage recall ye! This here site is the most famous of all mates. So Lillie's heart is broke for the first time. How could her Da do this? Ah, He be a pyrate after all. On her wedding night, surrounded by coin and finery, the old man slept.

All in a burst and blast, come barreling' threw the doors and windows were the crew mates of The Repungnante! Lillie be saved! Her Da, Stinky leadin' the way... carries her off to freedom's flight of the pyrate. The plan all along was to rob the old man of the dowry he paid for Lillie. It was the highest sum she would ever see paid for her in her lifetime, so far mates! The ship and crew all take off in nights' dark, navigation headed West toward the East Indies and Barbados. It would be a long voyage across the Atlantic. Runniní from the law was thrilliní and dangerous. The consequences if ye gets caught is certain death. The crew, captain and Durty Lillie arrive in Port Royal Jamaica, whilst Durty Lillie is still a virgin and a teenager. She is still one today as you know her. She did a little tyme in the local Gaol which is where she learned to read, badly.

Jewel LaFey was the progeny of a very beautiful and gifted Jewish psychic and Stinky Fingers LaFey, Sea Captain and Pyrate Scoundrel. She never had the pleasure of knowing her mother, Judithe the Seer. Captain LaFey tried in vain to find his little Jewel and heard she might be in the New World. Little Jewel, the younger sister, was spirited away as an infant and found on the Temple steps one afternoon in Port Royal Jamaica. Her basket was lined with precious jewels of every description. So, Jewel LaFey arrived.....and grew up to be both a gifted seer and a nifty nurse to the local brothels in Port Royal Jamaica. No task was too small, no job too large for the remarkable little lady.

A very sly, experienced and handsome pyrate named Michel Francois LaFey would be on the same course as his two cousins....toward Jamaica. He indeed was raised proper like and had a good education, that is until the age of 10, when his Mum ran away with him to England that is. Michel changed his name to Mike. He got into good schemes and great fights. He made a name fer himself as Ratty Mike of Walshire by the tyme he was 14 years of age. He decided a life at sea was called for when the magistrates of 3 counties had bounties on him for many many deeds he was blamed for.

The night before his hasty departure, a letter arrived from Normandy France. It was from his grandmama, The Countess Du La Fey. She advised him that his father was ill, and it was high tyme he knew the truth of his relatives and heritage. The truth was Michel had an Uncle, called Stinky Fingers LaFey who was captain of an ugly frigate called the Repugnante. He had two girl cousins named Lillie M.and Jewel. She believed the girls were headed for Jamaica. The old grand dame describes each girl in detail, both their mothers, and begs him to find her long lost grand-daughters. They three and any other LaFeys are the end of the family line she bemoans in her letter, stamped with the family crest. The crest said "In vos propris sanguine pasco". Means Blood mates. She encloses a tidy sum of money which certainly came in handy for Ratty Mike that night! He had much bribery to pay, getting safely out of English waters.

Early dusk, when the clouds and sky are a crescent orange, red and blue, the LaFey's met by accident at a tavern in Port Royal, Jamaica. The town had a taverns more numerous that one could count! It was a Tewsday as recalled...and Ratty was on his second rum and first wench. In walks the beautiful Jewel, their eyes meet. He immediately recognizes the mark on her lower right arm, left there by her mother. He sees the description of Jewel as matching that of one the girls the Countess wrote him about. They speak and Jewel, the seer, realizes that Ratty Mike not only has a past but a future with her. Durty Lillie is seated nearby, drunk and disorderly. She is brandishing a weapon too large for her size as usual again. She stops stone cold! She hears the name LaFey spoken. She looks over to Jewel and Ratty Mike. Ah new victims, mates! Sauntering over, hair smoothed down, her best walk, Durty Lillie approaches the two. It was a joyous day and they all do a fort-night in gaol, just to get better acquainted naturally!

So here we are, at the end of our first chapter ya scallywags, and the LaFeys have all arrived at Port Royal. Durty Lillie's in and out of Gaol, Jewel the Seer is working between the Temple and the Brothel, and Ratty Mike is a free man runnin' from English law in the new world. We have met a few other cousins along the way, from port to port. But none-o-them wants to join us in the sweet trade so far. Thinks they are afraid. Are you afraid of a LaFey? We have a beef with the Corsican sisters, all 23 of them, but that is for another time.

Avoir Ma Cheries!